Divorce Difficulties & The Holidays
Even though the holiday season is supposed a time of celebration, but for many divorced parents, the unhappy reality is more often that the holidays are a difficult time. At a time when most families are spending time together, divorced parents will likely have to share the time spent with their children with their ex. The depressing reality is that much of the holidays will be spent without the company of their children.
When families get together for the holidays, unexpected things can happen. The outcome of the celebrations depends on the people in the family and an enjoyable time can quickly become a time of arguments, fighting and general frustration. It doesn’t help things when the holidays involve heavy drinking and a party atmosphere can quickly degenerate into a drama fest or something worse.
Holiday disappointments can also be a deciding factor for people who are not yet divorced, but in a rocky relationship nonetheless. People may attempt to use the holiday season as a last chance deadline for a marriage, giving it one last try for the holidays. If the holidays are a big disappointment, the result is often a bunch of people filing for divorce right in January.
It’s important to try to be flexible and make the best of your time with your children if you have to share your kids over the holidays with your former spouse. You will not always get the exact date or amount of time that you might have wanted, but it shouldn’t degrade the time you do get to spend with your children. Kids don’t always understand why their parents are not together for the holidays and if you can encourage them to enjoy the time they spend with your former spouse it can help them to be happier and not feel guilty about not being with you the whole time. As a general rule, the happier and healthier the parents are, the happier the children will be.
If you can work with your former spouse to try to do what is best for your children it will help everyone have a happier holiday season. Holidays can be a time to stop and evaluate your relationships and what you want them to be. It can also be a great time to make a fresh start in life.