Divorce vs. Marriage

Aug 8, 2012 by

In today’s modern era of instant communication and instant gratification, divorce is no longer the social taboo it once was in the United States. In earlier decades divorce was viewed much more negatively and usually thought to be a disaster with far-reaching effects. It wasn’t until the divorce rate shot up in the 70’s, that people began to think that perhaps divorce was not such a bad thing after all.

Many felt divorce provided a solution for unhappily married couples and was not necessarily traumatic for children if they were given time to adapt to their new and unfamiliar situation. Today studies show that although divorce offer freedom to the adults involved, it often has adverse affects on the kids. Counselors have found that if a marriage can be saved, it is better than a divorce in almost every instance except when abuse is present. The result has been a shift toward encouragement of marriage and discouragement of divorce among professional therapists.

People used to think the worst part of a divorce was the initial family breakup and as time passed things got better. New research has shown that the negative effects of divorce on young children can last for decades. One of the long-term problems experienced by children that have come from divorced families is the inability to commit to a marriage because they have had no direct experience or example of a long-term love relationship in their own lives.

Many people facing a divorce seem to have a good idea of what they are getting out of, but few seem to fully understand what lies ahead. The suggestion that a divorce is much better than sticking it out in an unhappy marriage because there are children involved is losing traction too. Studies have shown that when people are willing to try to work through their differences, a marriage can actually be strengthened. Not to mention the fact that married people experience better health, higher incomes and longer life spans too.

One situation where divorce has been proven to provide improved physical and emotional health is when there is abuse or physical harm affecting a marriage and family. Abuse requires separation in almost all instances.  However, kids involved in a divorce can lead normal lives if they can overcome their fear of commitment. The ability to focus on solving relationship problems through communication is also important. People’s emotions change over time though and children will often feel differently about their parent’s divorce later when they become adults themselves and are no longer helpless children in the home at the time of the event.

When you weigh the factors from a social standpoint, marriage always wins the contest between marriage and divorce.  This fact is backed up by statistics that show marriage is better for men, women, children, the community and society too. Society depends on the
long-term commitment of marriage and family.


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