Should You Get a Divorce? Questions to Help You Decide

Riley Bouchard

By Divorce.com staff
Updated Oct 14, 2025

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Feeling uncertain about your marriage can be one of the hardest emotional crossroads in life. Divorce is an option, but deciding whether it’s the right one takes reflection and clarity.

At Divorce.com, we see thousands of people weighing this decision every year.

Our data shows that divorce isn’t limited to one gender — 52.4% of our users identifying as female and 47.6% identifying as male come to us seeking guidance and solutions.

In other words, people from all walks of life face these same questions, and you are not alone in wondering what’s next for your marriage.

What Has Made You Consider Divorce?

People start thinking about divorce for different reasons. For some, unhappiness has been building over years; for others, a recent event sparked new doubts.

  • Long-term concerns: If you’ve been unhappy for a long time, tried counseling, or made changes without improvement, you may feel like nothing can restore the relationship.

  • Recent triggers: A major incident or sudden shift—like betrayal, financial stress, or repeated conflict—can push couples into questioning their future.

Before making any decisions, it’s worth asking yourself whether there’s anything your spouse could realistically do that would make you want to stay.

Important: If you are in danger, feel unsafe with your spouse, or are experiencing abuse (emotional, physical, sexual, or financial), please contact your local domestic violence shelter or the National Domestic Violence Hotline at 800-799-SAFE (7233).

Evaluating if Divorce Is the Right Path

It’s natural to feel conflicted. Ask yourself:

  • Do I still love my spouse and believe the marriage can improve?

  • Was our marriage ever healthy and happy?

  • Am I considering divorce out of anger or hurt, or because I truly believe it’s over?

If you answered yes to these, divorce may not be the right step right now.

But if you’ve exhausted every option, no longer see a path forward, and feel ready for the challenges ahead, divorce may be the healthiest choice.

Questions About the Reality of Divorce

Even if you feel emotionally ready, divorce has practical realities to face. Think about:

  • Can I afford to live separately, and do I understand my financial situation after divorce?

  • Where will I live, and what would my new lifestyle look like?

  • How would divorce affect my children, and am I prepared to share parenting time?

  • Do I have the emotional energy to handle this process now?

If you don’t have clear answers yet, you may want to pause and plan before moving forward.

Signs You’re Ready to Divorce

Some people reach a point where the decision feels certain. You may be ready if:

  • Nothing your spouse does could change how you feel.

  • You’ve tried repeatedly to repair the relationship and found no success.

  • You understand the challenges of divorce but feel confident you can get through them.

  • You’re prepared financially and emotionally to start the next chapter.

  • If you have children, you feel ready to guide them through this transition.

Possible Paths Forward

Not every marriage question ends in divorce. Options include:

  • Staying as things are: Sometimes waiting and seeing feels best, especially if change is still possible.

  • Counseling: The Journal of Marital and Family Therapy reports that couples counseling has about a 70% success rate.

  • Making changes together: Couples who actively work on communication and shared goals sometimes rediscover connection.

  • Trial separation: Living apart can provide clarity. In some states, separation is even required before filing.

  • Divorce: When the marriage can’t be saved, moving forward with divorce may be the healthiest choice. Divorce.com offers affordable, guided services to help you take this step without unnecessary stress.

The Bottomline

Deciding whether to divorce is never easy. It involves both the heart and practical realities, and it can feel overwhelming at times. But you don’t have to go through this process alone.

 

At Divorce.com, we’ve helped thousands of people navigate these same crossroads with clarity, confidence, and support. Whatever you choose, the most important step is making the decision that feels right for you.

Wanting a Divorce FAQs

How do I know if divorce is the right choice?

If you’ve tried repairing your marriage but still feel certain it can’t improve, it may be time to consider divorce.

Can counseling really help?

Yes, many couples find counseling improves communication and connection. It may be worth trying before deciding.

What if I don’t feel financially ready for divorce?

It may help to pause and plan: review your budget, savings, and living options before moving forward.

Does Divorce.com offer support for this process?

Yes. Divorce.com provides tools, mediation, and affordable services to guide you through each step.

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