The Ultimate Guide to Getting Started in Your Divorce

Riley Bouchard

By Divorce.com staff
Updated Jan 24, 2025

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Divorce can be overwhelming, but the right knowledge and preparation can make the process more manageable. In our recent webinar, The Ultimate Guide to Getting Started in Your Divorce, we broke down the key steps to take when preparing for divorce. Whether you're just starting to think about separation or ready to move forward, these steps will set you up for a smoother process.

1. Involving Your Spouse

It’s important to set expectations about how and when you will have these divorce conversations. Some couples find that structured discussions—such as in therapy or mediation—help to keep emotions in check and allow for constructive planning. If your spouse refuses to engage, documenting your efforts and preparing for next steps independently will ensure that you can move forward without unnecessary roadblocks.

2. Researching State Laws

Every state has different divorce laws, including residency requirements, waiting periods, and property division rules. Understanding how divorce works in your state will help you make informed decisions and avoid unnecessary delays. Research online, consult legal professionals, or check official state websites for up-to-date information. In the webinar, we highlighted how states differ on no-fault and fault-based divorces, which can impact the timeline and strategy for your case.

3. Gathering Important Documents

Divorce requires a lot of paperwork, and getting organized early will save time and stress. Key documents to gather include:

Having these documents readily available can make property division and financial planning much easier.

4. Assessing Your Finances

Understanding your financial situation is critical during a divorce. Take inventory of your income, debts, and assets. Consider creating a budget for post-divorce life and determine whether you’ll need to adjust your living arrangements. Consulting a financial advisor or divorce financial specialist can help you navigate this step. Financial independence is crucial—many people underestimate the costs associated with separation.

5. Considering Children’s Needs

If you have children, their well-being should be a top priority. Think about custody arrangements, parenting schedules, and how you will handle major decisions together. Keeping lines of communication open with your spouse (when possible) can help create a co-parenting plan that minimizes stress for your children. Family mediators and therapists can also offer support during this transition. The webinar highlighted that consistency is key—children thrive on routine, so maintaining familiar structures will help them adjust.

6. Negotiation & Documentation

Once you have a clearer picture of your finances, legal requirements, and priorities, it’s time to start negotiating the terms of your divorce. Mediation can be a helpful tool for reaching agreements on key issues like asset division, child custody, and spousal support. Once agreements are in place, formalizing them in legally binding documents will help prevent future disputes. The webinar underscored the importance of being prepared with a clear list of priorities before entering negotiations.

Final Thoughts

Preparing for divorce can feel daunting, but breaking it down into manageable steps can make a significant difference. By communicating with your spouse, researching the laws, gathering documents, assessing finances, prioritizing your children, and carefully negotiating terms, you can approach the process with confidence. Our webinar provided real-life insights from experts and individuals who have gone through the process, reinforcing the importance of preparation and support.

If you're considering divorce and need guidance, Divorce.com offers expert resources and services to help you navigate the journey with clarity and support.

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Contents:

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