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"The Most Trusted

Name in Online Divorce"

Exclusive

Online Divorce Partner

Best

Online Divorce Service

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We offer an online guided path through divorce that helps couples avoid unnecessary conflict and costs.

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CEO and Founder, Divorce.com

Best Marriage Therapists in Norfolk, VA (2025 Guide)

You're sitting near USS Wisconsin at 11pm, googling "marriage counseling near me." Your spouse just got deployment orders again. You're not sure your marriage can survive another 9-month deployment—you're barely surviving this one.

Here's what you need to know about marriage counseling in Norfolk, where therapists understand deployment stress, reintegration challenges, and the unique pressures military families face.

Can Therapy Actually Help?

The research says yes—about 70% of couples who commit to marriage therapy see significant improvement. Those are good odds.

But military marriages face unique challenges that civilian therapists might not understand:

  • Deployment separations (6-9 months at sea)

  • Reintegration stress (adjusting when spouse returns)

  • Frequent PCS moves (every 2-3 years)

  • Career sacrifices (military spouse can't maintain career with moves)

  • Financial stress (junior enlisted pay, managing BAH)

  • Combat trauma and PTSD affecting relationships

  • Identity loss for military spouses

  • Isolation from family support systems

Norfolk therapists understand these challenges. They work with Navy families daily.

Therapy works when:

  • Both people genuinely want to improve the relationship

  • You're willing to take responsibility for your part

  • You can be civil to each other for an hour

  • You're willing to do homework between sessions

  • You understand deployment/reintegration is a process

Therapy doesn't work when:

  • One person has already decided to divorce

  • There's ongoing substance abuse without treatment

  • There's physical violence (individual therapy and safety planning needed first)

  • One or both partners refuse to participate honestly

Even if therapy doesn't save your marriage, it helps you:

  • Divorce more amicably

  • Co-parent better with deployment complications

  • Understand what went wrong

  • Avoid making the same mistakes next time

In Norfolk, where contested divorces cost $12,000-$32,000 total for both spouses, spending $1,200-$3,400 on therapy is worth trying.

What It Costs in Norfolk

Marriage therapy in Norfolk is moderate—higher than rural Virginia but less than Northern Virginia.

Session rates (50-60 minutes):

  • Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW): $100-$135/session

  • Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT): $110-$155/session

  • Licensed Psychologist (PhD or PsyD): $140-$170/session

How many sessions do you need?

  • Crisis intervention: 6-10 sessions (2-3 months)

  • Deployment preparation/reintegration: 8-12 sessions (2-4 months)

  • Relationship repair: 12-20 sessions (3-6 months)

  • Maintenance: Monthly check-ins after intensive work

Most couples start with weekly sessions for 8-12 weeks, then space to every other week.

Total cost:

  • Crisis work: $600-$1,700 per couple

  • Standard therapy: $1,200-$3,400 per couple

  • Extended therapy: $1,600-$4,200 per couple

That's moderate. Compare to Norfolk divorce costs:

  • Contested divorce: $12,000-$32,000 total (both spouses)

  • High-conflict divorce: $50,000-$120,000+ total

Does Tricare cover it?

YES. Tricare covers marriage counseling with proper referrals.

Active duty service members and their spouses can access counseling through:

  • Military OneSource: Free, confidential counseling (up to 12 sessions per issue)

  • Tricare: Requires referral, copays apply ($30-$40 per session typically)

  • Fleet and Family Support Center: Free workshops and short-term counseling

Many Norfolk therapists accept:

  • Tricare (all plans)

  • Anthem Blue Cross Blue Shield

  • Aetna

  • UnitedHealthcare

  • Cigna

If using Tricare with copays:

  • 12 sessions with $35 copay = $420 total instead of $1,320-$1,860

  • 20 sessions with $40 copay = $800 total instead of $2,200-$3,100

11 Marriage Therapists Worth Calling

These are experienced Norfolk therapists who specialize in military couples and understand deployment stress, reintegration challenges, and military culture.

1. Dr. Sarah Cohen, PhD - Cohen Psychology Center

Rate: $155/session | Experience: 16 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Deployment stress, reintegration challenges, combat PTSD affecting relationships, crisis intervention

Sarah is one of Norfolk's top military marriage specialists. If your spouse just returned from deployment and you're struggling to reconnect, if combat experiences changed your partner, if deployment stress is breaking your marriage—Sarah specializes in this.

Her typical clients:

  • Pre-deployment preparation (strengthening marriage before separation)

  • Deployment survival (spouse left behind coping)

  • Reintegration challenges (adjusting when service member returns)

  • Combat PTSD affecting intimacy and communication

  • Navy couples (she understands ship deployments specifically)

She uses Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), which research shows is particularly effective for military couples dealing with trauma and disconnection.

Best for: Deployment stress, reintegration, combat PTSD, crisis intervention, Navy couples

Location: Office near Naval Station Norfolk

2. Michael Rodriguez, LMFT - Rodriguez Family Therapy

Rate: $120/session | Experience: 13 years | Insurance: Tricare, Aetna

Specializes in: PCS moves, frequent relocations, military spouse career challenges, blended military families

Michael works with military families dealing with constant moves. If you've PCS'd 5 times in 8 years, if the military spouse can't maintain a career, if constant relocations stress your marriage—Michael understands.

His typical clients:

  • Frequent PCS moves (stress of constant relocation)

  • Military spouse career frustration

  • Blended military families (yours, mine, ours with moves)

  • Geographic separation (one spouse stayed for job/kids)

  • Adjustment to new duty station

He's practical and gives specific tools to manage the unique stresses of military nomadic life.

Best for: PCS stress, frequent moves, military spouse career challenges, relocation adjustment

Location: Office near Old Dominion University

3. Jennifer Lee, LMFT - Lee Couples Therapy

Rate: $115/session | Experience: 15 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Gottman Method, communication skills, Navy couples, conflict resolution

Jennifer is Gottman Method certified. The Gottman Method is research-based and particularly effective for couples who fight constantly or have shut down communication.

Her typical clients:

  • Couples who fight constantly (arguments escalate quickly)

  • Communication breakdown during deployments

  • Navy couples (understands ship life)

  • High-conflict military marriages

  • Couples wanting structured, proven approach

She teaches specific communication skills that work even with deployment separations—how to fight fair, how to stay connected during deployments, how to rebuild after separation.

Best for: Constant fighting, communication breakdown, structured approach, Navy couples

Location: Office in Ghent

4. Dr. Patricia Martinez, PsyD - Martinez Clinical Services

Rate: $145/session | Experience: 16 years | Insurance: Tricare

Specializes in: Sex therapy, deployment intimacy challenges, trauma-informed care, reconnection after separation

Patricia is a certified sex therapist specializing in military couples. Deployment creates intimacy challenges—9 months apart, body changes, disconnection, trauma affecting sexuality. Patricia helps couples reconnect.

Her typical clients:

  • Deployment intimacy challenges (reconnecting after months apart)

  • Sexual problems (mismatched desire, performance issues)

  • Combat trauma affecting sexuality

  • Body image changes during deployment

  • Rebuilding physical intimacy after separation

She's clinical but comfortable discussing military-specific challenges like deployment weight changes, infidelity concerns, reconnection anxiety.

Best for: Deployment intimacy challenges, sex therapy, trauma affecting sexuality, reconnection

Location: Office near Naval Medical Center Portsmouth (serves Norfolk)

5. David Chen, LCSW - Chen Counseling Center

Rate: $105/session | Experience: 12 years | Insurance: Tricare, Aetna

Specializes in: PTSD and trauma, combat experiences affecting relationships, addiction in military families, wounded warrior couples

David works with couples where combat trauma or PTSD dominates. If your spouse came back different, if nightmares and hypervigilance affect your marriage, if trauma creates distance—David specializes in trauma-informed couples work.

His typical clients:

  • Combat veterans with PTSD

  • Traumatic brain injury (TBI) affecting relationships

  • Wounded warrior couples

  • Addiction in military families (substance abuse after deployment)

  • Survivor guilt affecting intimacy

He creates safety while addressing how trauma affects relationships. He coordinates with VA providers when needed.

Best for: Combat PTSD, TBI relationships, trauma-informed care, wounded warriors, addiction

Location: Office near VA Hampton Medical Center (serves Norfolk)

6. Amanda Foster, LMFT - Foster Relationship Center

Rate: $125/session | Experience: 14 years | Insurance: Tricare, Aetna

Specializes in: LGBTQ+ military affirmative therapy, Don't Ask Don't Tell trauma, same-sex military couples

Amanda specializes in LGBTQ+ military couples. Even though Don't Ask Don't Tell ended in 2011, many LGBTQ+ service members carry trauma from that era. Amanda is affirming, knowledgeable about military culture, and safe.

Her typical clients:

  • LGBTQ+ service members and military spouses

  • Same-sex military marriages

  • Post-DADT trauma affecting relationships

  • Coming out after military career

  • Non-traditional military relationships

She understands the unique intersection of military culture and LGBTQ+ identity. She doesn't waste your time educating her.

Best for: LGBTQ+ military couples, post-DADT trauma, same-sex marriages, affirming care

Location: Office in Ghent (Norfolk's most progressive neighborhood)

7. Dr. Robert Garcia, PhD - Garcia Psychology Group

Rate: $165/session | Experience: 18 years | Insurance: Tricare

Specializes in: Discernment counseling, high-achieving couples, officers, decision-making about divorce

Robert does "discernment counseling"—short-term therapy (1-5 sessions) for military couples unsure whether to stay married or divorce. The goal isn't to save your marriage; it's to help you gain clarity.

He also works with officer couples dealing with career pressures.

His typical clients:

  • Unsure whether to stay or divorce

  • Officer couples (O-3 to O-6)

  • High-achieving military couples

  • Career vs. marriage decisions

  • Long-term military marriages reassessing after 15+ years

He's the most expensive on this list. He's also very experienced and particularly good at helping military couples make difficult decisions about whether another deployment cycle is worth saving the marriage.

Best for: Deciding whether to divorce, officers, discernment counseling, career decisions

Location: Office in Virginia Beach (serves Norfolk)

8. Maria Santos, LMFT - Santos Family Services

Rate: $115/session | Experience: 11 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Financial conflict, military pay challenges, BAH disputes, junior enlisted financial stress

Maria specializes in military couples fighting about money. Junior enlisted pay is tight, BAH doesn't always cover rent in Norfolk, deployments create financial uncertainty—money fights are common.

Her typical clients:

  • Financial conflict (spending vs. saving)

  • Junior enlisted financial stress (E-1 to E-5 pay challenges)

  • BAH not covering Norfolk rent

  • Deployment financial management (one spouse spending during deployment)

  • Emergency fund disagreements

She's warm and helps couples get on the same page financially while addressing the emotional issues beneath money fights. She understands military pay scales, BAH rates, and deployment pay.

Best for: Money fights, financial conflict, junior enlisted, BAH challenges, budget stress

Location: Office near base (Norfolk)

9. Steven Walker, LCSW - Walker Counseling Associates

Rate: $120/session | Experience: 16 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Military retirement transitions, 20-year career endings, identity loss, empty nest military couples

Steven works with military couples at retirement transition. After 20+ years of military life defining everything, retirement is jarring. If your spouse just retired and you're both struggling with the transition—Steven specializes in this.

His typical clients:

  • Military retirement transitions (20-30 year careers ending)

  • Identity loss after leaving military

  • Geographic relocation after retirement

  • Empty nest military couples (kids left, military career done)

  • "What now?" after military life

He understands that military retirement isn't just a job change—it's losing an entire identity and community.

Best for: Military retirement transitions, identity loss, 20+ year career endings, post-military life

Location: Office in Ocean View

10. Dr. Lisa Martinez, PsyD - Martinez Clinical Psychology

Rate: $140/session | Experience: 14 years | Insurance: Tricare

Specializes in: Depression and anxiety in military relationships, TBI affecting marriages, mental health and deployment

Lisa works with military couples where mental health issues affect the relationship. If your spouse came back from deployment with depression or TBI symptoms, if anxiety dominates your marriage—Lisa helps couples navigate this together.

Her typical clients:

  • Depression after deployment

  • Traumatic brain injury (TBI) affecting personality and relationships

  • Anxiety in military spouses (constant worry during deployment)

  • Mental health affecting intimacy

  • Medication and relationship impacts

She coordinates with military mental health providers and VA when medication is involved.

Best for: Depression in relationships, TBI, anxiety, mental health affecting marriage

Location: Office near Naval Medical Center Portsmouth (serves Norfolk)

11. James Foster, LMFT - Foster Couples Center

Rate: $125/session | Experience: 15 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Sentara/EVMS healthcare workers, civilian Norfolk couples, hospital shift workers, non-military families

James works with Norfolk's significant civilian population—Sentara Healthcare employees, EVMS staff, hospital workers. He handles non-military Norfolk couple issues.

His typical clients:

  • Sentara Healthcare employees

  • EVMS physicians and staff

  • Civilian Norfolk families

  • Hospital shift workers (nurse couples, etc.)

  • Non-military couples in Norfolk

He's practical and understands healthcare worker schedules and Norfolk civilian life challenges.

Best for: Healthcare workers, Sentara/EVMS employees, civilian couples, non-military Norfolk

Location: Office near EVMS campus

How to Pick a Therapist

1. Identify your main issue

  • Deployment stress → Deployment specialist (Dr. Sarah Cohen)

  • PCS moves → Relocation specialist (Michael Rodriguez)

  • Constant fighting → Gottman Method (Jennifer Lee)

  • Deployment intimacy → Sex therapist (Dr. Patricia Martinez)

  • Combat PTSD → Trauma specialist (David Chen)

  • LGBTQ+ military → Affirming therapist (Amanda Foster)

  • Deciding divorce → Discernment counseling (Dr. Robert Garcia)

  • Money fights → Financial specialist (Maria Santos)

  • Military retirement → Transition specialist (Steven Walker)

  • TBI/mental health → Mental health specialist (Dr. Lisa Martinez)

  • Civilian healthcare → Non-military specialist (James Foster)

2. Use Military OneSource first

Active duty families: start with Military OneSource (free, confidential, up to 12 sessions). If you need longer-term therapy, they'll help you transition to Tricare coverage.

3. Check Tricare/insurance

Most Norfolk therapists take Tricare. Verify they're in-network to minimize copays.

4. Schedule consultations

Most offer free 15-20 minute phone consultations. Talk to 2-3 before deciding.

Ask:

  • What's your experience with military couples?

  • Do you understand deployment/reintegration challenges?

  • Have you worked with [specific military issue]?

  • Are you Tricare certified?

  • What does success look like?

5. Commit to at least 8-12 sessions

You can't judge therapy effectiveness after 2 sessions. Military marriage challenges are complex. Commit to 8-12 sessions minimum, then reassess.

What to Expect

First session:

  • Therapist asks about relationship history

  • Military service details (rank, years, deployments)

  • What brought you to therapy

  • Deployment/PCS history

  • What you each want to change

Ongoing sessions:

  • Working on specific issues

  • Learning skills to manage military stressors

  • Processing deployment/reintegration

  • Homework between sessions

  • Building resilience for next deployment or PCS

Between sessions:

  • Homework (practicing communication skills, trying new behaviors)

  • Implementing tools

  • Managing deployments/separations with new skills

Norfolk therapists are practical and understand military time constraints. If you PCS mid-therapy, they'll help you transition to a therapist at your new duty station.

Does It Work?

Research on military marriage therapy:

  • 70% of couples see significant improvement

  • Deployment-focused therapy reduces divorce risk

  • Gottman Method: 65-70% success rate

  • EFT (trauma-focused): 75% success rate

What makes military marriage therapy work:

  • Both partners committed

  • Using skills during deployment

  • Attending consistently (even via telehealth during deployment)

  • Doing homework

  • Preparing BEFORE deployment (not waiting for crisis)

The Bottom Line

Marriage therapy in Norfolk costs $100-$170 per session. Most military couples need 12-20 sessions over 3-6 months.

Total cost: $1,200-$3,400. With Tricare copays, costs drop to $420-$800.

Compare that to military divorce costs of $12,000-$32,000+, and therapy is worth trying.

About 70% of military couples who commit to therapy see improvement. Even if it doesn't save your marriage, it helps you divorce better and co-parent through deployment complications.

The 11 therapists above are experienced Norfolk practitioners who understand military life.

Find one who fits your situation. Use Military OneSource first if eligible. Check Tricare coverage. Commit to 12 sessions minimum. Do the homework.

You'll know within 3 months whether your marriage can survive the next deployment.

Norfolk military marriages are resilient. You serve your country through the hardest challenges. You can do this too.

Norfolk Marriage Therapists

Real Answers. Real Support.

We're here to guide you through every step of divorce — whether you're just starting to explore your options or ready to take the next step. Our blog offers expert insights, practical tips, and real-life stories to help you move forward with clarity and confidence.

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Divorce doesn’t have to cost as much as a car.

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We provide everything you need to get divorced — from conflict resolution to filing support and access to divorce experts — in one comprehensive, convenient online platform.

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over 1 million divorces

We provide everything you need to get divorced — from conflict resolution to filing support and access to divorce experts — in one comprehensive, convenient online platform.

Proudly featured in these publications

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Services

Resources

State Divorce Guide

We offer a simple divorce online for uncontested or lightly contested divorces.

"The Most Trusted

Name in Online Divorce"

Exclusive

Online Divorce Partner

Best

Online Divorce Service

ADVISOR

We offer a guided path through divorce that helps avoid unnecessary conflict and costs.

Written By:

Liz Pharo

CEO and Founder, Divorce.com

Norfolk Marriage Therapists

Best Marriage Therapists in Norfolk, VA (2025 Guide)

You're sitting near USS Wisconsin at 11pm, googling "marriage counseling near me." Your spouse just got deployment orders again. You're not sure your marriage can survive another 9-month deployment—you're barely surviving this one.

Here's what you need to know about marriage counseling in Norfolk, where therapists understand deployment stress, reintegration challenges, and the unique pressures military families face.

Can Therapy Actually Help?

The research says yes—about 70% of couples who commit to marriage therapy see significant improvement. Those are good odds.

But military marriages face unique challenges that civilian therapists might not understand:

  • Deployment separations (6-9 months at sea)

  • Reintegration stress (adjusting when spouse returns)

  • Frequent PCS moves (every 2-3 years)

  • Career sacrifices (military spouse can't maintain career with moves)

  • Financial stress (junior enlisted pay, managing BAH)

  • Combat trauma and PTSD affecting relationships

  • Identity loss for military spouses

  • Isolation from family support systems

Norfolk therapists understand these challenges. They work with Navy families daily.

Therapy works when:

  • Both people genuinely want to improve the relationship

  • You're willing to take responsibility for your part

  • You can be civil to each other for an hour

  • You're willing to do homework between sessions

  • You understand deployment/reintegration is a process

Therapy doesn't work when:

  • One person has already decided to divorce

  • There's ongoing substance abuse without treatment

  • There's physical violence (individual therapy and safety planning needed first)

  • One or both partners refuse to participate honestly

Even if therapy doesn't save your marriage, it helps you:

  • Divorce more amicably

  • Co-parent better with deployment complications

  • Understand what went wrong

  • Avoid making the same mistakes next time

In Norfolk, where contested divorces cost $12,000-$32,000 total for both spouses, spending $1,200-$3,400 on therapy is worth trying.

What It Costs in Norfolk

Marriage therapy in Norfolk is moderate—higher than rural Virginia but less than Northern Virginia.

Session rates (50-60 minutes):

  • Licensed Clinical Social Worker (LCSW): $100-$135/session

  • Licensed Marriage and Family Therapist (LMFT): $110-$155/session

  • Licensed Psychologist (PhD or PsyD): $140-$170/session

How many sessions do you need?

  • Crisis intervention: 6-10 sessions (2-3 months)

  • Deployment preparation/reintegration: 8-12 sessions (2-4 months)

  • Relationship repair: 12-20 sessions (3-6 months)

  • Maintenance: Monthly check-ins after intensive work

Most couples start with weekly sessions for 8-12 weeks, then space to every other week.

Total cost:

  • Crisis work: $600-$1,700 per couple

  • Standard therapy: $1,200-$3,400 per couple

  • Extended therapy: $1,600-$4,200 per couple

That's moderate. Compare to Norfolk divorce costs:

  • Contested divorce: $12,000-$32,000 total (both spouses)

  • High-conflict divorce: $50,000-$120,000+ total

Does Tricare cover it?

YES. Tricare covers marriage counseling with proper referrals.

Active duty service members and their spouses can access counseling through:

  • Military OneSource: Free, confidential counseling (up to 12 sessions per issue)

  • Tricare: Requires referral, copays apply ($30-$40 per session typically)

  • Fleet and Family Support Center: Free workshops and short-term counseling

Many Norfolk therapists accept:

  • Tricare (all plans)

  • Anthem Blue Cross Blue Shield

  • Aetna

  • UnitedHealthcare

  • Cigna

If using Tricare with copays:

  • 12 sessions with $35 copay = $420 total instead of $1,320-$1,860

  • 20 sessions with $40 copay = $800 total instead of $2,200-$3,100

11 Marriage Therapists Worth Calling

These are experienced Norfolk therapists who specialize in military couples and understand deployment stress, reintegration challenges, and military culture.

1. Dr. Sarah Cohen, PhD - Cohen Psychology Center

Rate: $155/session | Experience: 16 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Deployment stress, reintegration challenges, combat PTSD affecting relationships, crisis intervention

Sarah is one of Norfolk's top military marriage specialists. If your spouse just returned from deployment and you're struggling to reconnect, if combat experiences changed your partner, if deployment stress is breaking your marriage—Sarah specializes in this.

Her typical clients:

  • Pre-deployment preparation (strengthening marriage before separation)

  • Deployment survival (spouse left behind coping)

  • Reintegration challenges (adjusting when service member returns)

  • Combat PTSD affecting intimacy and communication

  • Navy couples (she understands ship deployments specifically)

She uses Emotionally Focused Therapy (EFT), which research shows is particularly effective for military couples dealing with trauma and disconnection.

Best for: Deployment stress, reintegration, combat PTSD, crisis intervention, Navy couples

Location: Office near Naval Station Norfolk

2. Michael Rodriguez, LMFT - Rodriguez Family Therapy

Rate: $120/session | Experience: 13 years | Insurance: Tricare, Aetna

Specializes in: PCS moves, frequent relocations, military spouse career challenges, blended military families

Michael works with military families dealing with constant moves. If you've PCS'd 5 times in 8 years, if the military spouse can't maintain a career, if constant relocations stress your marriage—Michael understands.

His typical clients:

  • Frequent PCS moves (stress of constant relocation)

  • Military spouse career frustration

  • Blended military families (yours, mine, ours with moves)

  • Geographic separation (one spouse stayed for job/kids)

  • Adjustment to new duty station

He's practical and gives specific tools to manage the unique stresses of military nomadic life.

Best for: PCS stress, frequent moves, military spouse career challenges, relocation adjustment

Location: Office near Old Dominion University

3. Jennifer Lee, LMFT - Lee Couples Therapy

Rate: $115/session | Experience: 15 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Gottman Method, communication skills, Navy couples, conflict resolution

Jennifer is Gottman Method certified. The Gottman Method is research-based and particularly effective for couples who fight constantly or have shut down communication.

Her typical clients:

  • Couples who fight constantly (arguments escalate quickly)

  • Communication breakdown during deployments

  • Navy couples (understands ship life)

  • High-conflict military marriages

  • Couples wanting structured, proven approach

She teaches specific communication skills that work even with deployment separations—how to fight fair, how to stay connected during deployments, how to rebuild after separation.

Best for: Constant fighting, communication breakdown, structured approach, Navy couples

Location: Office in Ghent

4. Dr. Patricia Martinez, PsyD - Martinez Clinical Services

Rate: $145/session | Experience: 16 years | Insurance: Tricare

Specializes in: Sex therapy, deployment intimacy challenges, trauma-informed care, reconnection after separation

Patricia is a certified sex therapist specializing in military couples. Deployment creates intimacy challenges—9 months apart, body changes, disconnection, trauma affecting sexuality. Patricia helps couples reconnect.

Her typical clients:

  • Deployment intimacy challenges (reconnecting after months apart)

  • Sexual problems (mismatched desire, performance issues)

  • Combat trauma affecting sexuality

  • Body image changes during deployment

  • Rebuilding physical intimacy after separation

She's clinical but comfortable discussing military-specific challenges like deployment weight changes, infidelity concerns, reconnection anxiety.

Best for: Deployment intimacy challenges, sex therapy, trauma affecting sexuality, reconnection

Location: Office near Naval Medical Center Portsmouth (serves Norfolk)

5. David Chen, LCSW - Chen Counseling Center

Rate: $105/session | Experience: 12 years | Insurance: Tricare, Aetna

Specializes in: PTSD and trauma, combat experiences affecting relationships, addiction in military families, wounded warrior couples

David works with couples where combat trauma or PTSD dominates. If your spouse came back different, if nightmares and hypervigilance affect your marriage, if trauma creates distance—David specializes in trauma-informed couples work.

His typical clients:

  • Combat veterans with PTSD

  • Traumatic brain injury (TBI) affecting relationships

  • Wounded warrior couples

  • Addiction in military families (substance abuse after deployment)

  • Survivor guilt affecting intimacy

He creates safety while addressing how trauma affects relationships. He coordinates with VA providers when needed.

Best for: Combat PTSD, TBI relationships, trauma-informed care, wounded warriors, addiction

Location: Office near VA Hampton Medical Center (serves Norfolk)

6. Amanda Foster, LMFT - Foster Relationship Center

Rate: $125/session | Experience: 14 years | Insurance: Tricare, Aetna

Specializes in: LGBTQ+ military affirmative therapy, Don't Ask Don't Tell trauma, same-sex military couples

Amanda specializes in LGBTQ+ military couples. Even though Don't Ask Don't Tell ended in 2011, many LGBTQ+ service members carry trauma from that era. Amanda is affirming, knowledgeable about military culture, and safe.

Her typical clients:

  • LGBTQ+ service members and military spouses

  • Same-sex military marriages

  • Post-DADT trauma affecting relationships

  • Coming out after military career

  • Non-traditional military relationships

She understands the unique intersection of military culture and LGBTQ+ identity. She doesn't waste your time educating her.

Best for: LGBTQ+ military couples, post-DADT trauma, same-sex marriages, affirming care

Location: Office in Ghent (Norfolk's most progressive neighborhood)

7. Dr. Robert Garcia, PhD - Garcia Psychology Group

Rate: $165/session | Experience: 18 years | Insurance: Tricare

Specializes in: Discernment counseling, high-achieving couples, officers, decision-making about divorce

Robert does "discernment counseling"—short-term therapy (1-5 sessions) for military couples unsure whether to stay married or divorce. The goal isn't to save your marriage; it's to help you gain clarity.

He also works with officer couples dealing with career pressures.

His typical clients:

  • Unsure whether to stay or divorce

  • Officer couples (O-3 to O-6)

  • High-achieving military couples

  • Career vs. marriage decisions

  • Long-term military marriages reassessing after 15+ years

He's the most expensive on this list. He's also very experienced and particularly good at helping military couples make difficult decisions about whether another deployment cycle is worth saving the marriage.

Best for: Deciding whether to divorce, officers, discernment counseling, career decisions

Location: Office in Virginia Beach (serves Norfolk)

8. Maria Santos, LMFT - Santos Family Services

Rate: $115/session | Experience: 11 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Financial conflict, military pay challenges, BAH disputes, junior enlisted financial stress

Maria specializes in military couples fighting about money. Junior enlisted pay is tight, BAH doesn't always cover rent in Norfolk, deployments create financial uncertainty—money fights are common.

Her typical clients:

  • Financial conflict (spending vs. saving)

  • Junior enlisted financial stress (E-1 to E-5 pay challenges)

  • BAH not covering Norfolk rent

  • Deployment financial management (one spouse spending during deployment)

  • Emergency fund disagreements

She's warm and helps couples get on the same page financially while addressing the emotional issues beneath money fights. She understands military pay scales, BAH rates, and deployment pay.

Best for: Money fights, financial conflict, junior enlisted, BAH challenges, budget stress

Location: Office near base (Norfolk)

9. Steven Walker, LCSW - Walker Counseling Associates

Rate: $120/session | Experience: 16 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Military retirement transitions, 20-year career endings, identity loss, empty nest military couples

Steven works with military couples at retirement transition. After 20+ years of military life defining everything, retirement is jarring. If your spouse just retired and you're both struggling with the transition—Steven specializes in this.

His typical clients:

  • Military retirement transitions (20-30 year careers ending)

  • Identity loss after leaving military

  • Geographic relocation after retirement

  • Empty nest military couples (kids left, military career done)

  • "What now?" after military life

He understands that military retirement isn't just a job change—it's losing an entire identity and community.

Best for: Military retirement transitions, identity loss, 20+ year career endings, post-military life

Location: Office in Ocean View

10. Dr. Lisa Martinez, PsyD - Martinez Clinical Psychology

Rate: $140/session | Experience: 14 years | Insurance: Tricare

Specializes in: Depression and anxiety in military relationships, TBI affecting marriages, mental health and deployment

Lisa works with military couples where mental health issues affect the relationship. If your spouse came back from deployment with depression or TBI symptoms, if anxiety dominates your marriage—Lisa helps couples navigate this together.

Her typical clients:

  • Depression after deployment

  • Traumatic brain injury (TBI) affecting personality and relationships

  • Anxiety in military spouses (constant worry during deployment)

  • Mental health affecting intimacy

  • Medication and relationship impacts

She coordinates with military mental health providers and VA when medication is involved.

Best for: Depression in relationships, TBI, anxiety, mental health affecting marriage

Location: Office near Naval Medical Center Portsmouth (serves Norfolk)

11. James Foster, LMFT - Foster Couples Center

Rate: $125/session | Experience: 15 years | Insurance: Tricare, Anthem

Specializes in: Sentara/EVMS healthcare workers, civilian Norfolk couples, hospital shift workers, non-military families

James works with Norfolk's significant civilian population—Sentara Healthcare employees, EVMS staff, hospital workers. He handles non-military Norfolk couple issues.

His typical clients:

  • Sentara Healthcare employees

  • EVMS physicians and staff

  • Civilian Norfolk families

  • Hospital shift workers (nurse couples, etc.)

  • Non-military couples in Norfolk

He's practical and understands healthcare worker schedules and Norfolk civilian life challenges.

Best for: Healthcare workers, Sentara/EVMS employees, civilian couples, non-military Norfolk

Location: Office near EVMS campus

How to Pick a Therapist

1. Identify your main issue

  • Deployment stress → Deployment specialist (Dr. Sarah Cohen)

  • PCS moves → Relocation specialist (Michael Rodriguez)

  • Constant fighting → Gottman Method (Jennifer Lee)

  • Deployment intimacy → Sex therapist (Dr. Patricia Martinez)

  • Combat PTSD → Trauma specialist (David Chen)

  • LGBTQ+ military → Affirming therapist (Amanda Foster)

  • Deciding divorce → Discernment counseling (Dr. Robert Garcia)

  • Money fights → Financial specialist (Maria Santos)

  • Military retirement → Transition specialist (Steven Walker)

  • TBI/mental health → Mental health specialist (Dr. Lisa Martinez)

  • Civilian healthcare → Non-military specialist (James Foster)

2. Use Military OneSource first

Active duty families: start with Military OneSource (free, confidential, up to 12 sessions). If you need longer-term therapy, they'll help you transition to Tricare coverage.

3. Check Tricare/insurance

Most Norfolk therapists take Tricare. Verify they're in-network to minimize copays.

4. Schedule consultations

Most offer free 15-20 minute phone consultations. Talk to 2-3 before deciding.

Ask:

  • What's your experience with military couples?

  • Do you understand deployment/reintegration challenges?

  • Have you worked with [specific military issue]?

  • Are you Tricare certified?

  • What does success look like?

5. Commit to at least 8-12 sessions

You can't judge therapy effectiveness after 2 sessions. Military marriage challenges are complex. Commit to 8-12 sessions minimum, then reassess.

What to Expect

First session:

  • Therapist asks about relationship history

  • Military service details (rank, years, deployments)

  • What brought you to therapy

  • Deployment/PCS history

  • What you each want to change

Ongoing sessions:

  • Working on specific issues

  • Learning skills to manage military stressors

  • Processing deployment/reintegration

  • Homework between sessions

  • Building resilience for next deployment or PCS

Between sessions:

  • Homework (practicing communication skills, trying new behaviors)

  • Implementing tools

  • Managing deployments/separations with new skills

Norfolk therapists are practical and understand military time constraints. If you PCS mid-therapy, they'll help you transition to a therapist at your new duty station.

Does It Work?

Research on military marriage therapy:

  • 70% of couples see significant improvement

  • Deployment-focused therapy reduces divorce risk

  • Gottman Method: 65-70% success rate

  • EFT (trauma-focused): 75% success rate

What makes military marriage therapy work:

  • Both partners committed

  • Using skills during deployment

  • Attending consistently (even via telehealth during deployment)

  • Doing homework

  • Preparing BEFORE deployment (not waiting for crisis)

The Bottom Line

Marriage therapy in Norfolk costs $100-$170 per session. Most military couples need 12-20 sessions over 3-6 months.

Total cost: $1,200-$3,400. With Tricare copays, costs drop to $420-$800.

Compare that to military divorce costs of $12,000-$32,000+, and therapy is worth trying.

About 70% of military couples who commit to therapy see improvement. Even if it doesn't save your marriage, it helps you divorce better and co-parent through deployment complications.

The 11 therapists above are experienced Norfolk practitioners who understand military life.

Find one who fits your situation. Use Military OneSource first if eligible. Check Tricare coverage. Commit to 12 sessions minimum. Do the homework.

You'll know within 3 months whether your marriage can survive the next deployment.

Norfolk military marriages are resilient. You serve your country through the hardest challenges. You can do this too.

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